My Mission and Before

November 11, 2013

Hey there,

Well I am not even sure where to start. It's been kinda a rough emotional week for me. I'm not the best person when it comes to be seeing. Maybe I get that from dad :) I'm very grateful that I have an amazing companion who does not complain. I hope that we will stick together for this next transfer. I may have even written president and begged... is that too much?

Well, first things first. I am doing better. Today was my last day on antibiotics and I do feel better. Not 100 percent but good enough to go on about missionary work. I've got quite the cough that Sora Newell gives me the pitty look every time. Ughhh I am not a fan of the pitty look. But I am so excited for all the possibilities that we have here in Constanta and can not wait to get started.

From our English classes we have been able to obtain a few investigators. It is so cool. One of the girls, oh my heck, SHE WILL BE BAPTIZED! She actually came to our Halloween party two weeks ago and we were able to meet up with her this week. She is amazing. She prays every night and every morning using her own words. She loves families. That is what she wants. She wants a family she wants someone with good moral values. We had exchanges this week so I wasn't able to go to her lesson but basically Sora Newell and Sora Polatis came back and just screamed that she is GOLDEN. She's a sweet heart and I can not wait to meet with her again this week.

Another lady from our English Class we were able to meet with her name is Ecaterina. She's older and is married and I guess her husband is in our English class... I did not realize this until after our lesson! Embarrassing moment for Sora Stewart here. She's a sweet heart. She basically told us that everything she has heard in our English classes with our spiritual thoughts are amazing. She loves the way we pray and how we have a relationship with God. She also talks a lot. Haha that's fine though. We were really able to put our listening skills together and she really listened when we talked about the Book of Mormon. She agreed to read and she asked next time if her husband can come in with her instead of waiting in the car. HAHA She made him wait in the car. I thought that it was so funny but I also felt really bad. So we will be meeting with both of them this week. :)

Well I said early that I was having an extreme emotional week. Probably has a lot to do with the fact that I was sick, but I was just so down on myself. I just saw ALL of my imperfections everything that I had to work on. Things that I needed to be better at and I just thought that I can not do this. I can not teach, I can not speak this language, I can not be a good trainer, I just can't do these things. I was so down on myself... sometimes I get a little caught up on perfection. I am just not Mom yet. Mom, how do you do it? So luckily the STL's (Sister Trainer Leaders) came down last week and I went on an exchange with Sora Lund. LOVE HER. I basically just told her of things that I was worried about... basically that I am not perfect and am not this perfect missionary. She literally sat me down and said that God does not expect us to be perfect. Which is true. I feel like I seriously lack sometimes in knowing who our Father in Heaven is. How He acts and how He loves us despite the things we lack and our imperfections. She told me that the way she imagines our Heavenly Father is that He is so proud of us. That when we talk and we mess up or when we try to teach and the are unresponsive it is okay and Heavenly Father is just cheering for us. He is literally on the other side saying,"Hey it's okay! That was great! Look you just talked you testified of me. I am proud of you." It reminded me of Dad's letter that said to imagine Heavenly Father screaming the the TV just like Dad with football. Haha. :) But it's so true. So I really started to study more and something I really wanted to study was Bruce R. McConkie's "7 Deady Herecies." So good just FYI. A lot of it I knew and it was a really good talk but the last herecy he basically says that the heresy is that we have to be perfect to have salvation. And this is part of what he said. Like I said it's AMAZING.

  "We must determine in our hearts and in our souls, with all the power and ability we have, that from this time forward we will press on in righteousness; by so doing we can go where God and Christ are. If we make that firm determination, and are in the course of our duty when this life is over, we will continue in that course in eternity. That same spirit that possesses our bodies at the time we depart from this mortal life will have power to possess our bodies in the eternal world. If we go out of this life loving the Lord, desiring righteousness, and seeking to acquire the attributes of godliness, we will have that same spirit in the eternal world, and we will then continue to advance and progress until an ultimate, destined day when we will possess, receive, and inherit all things"

This is what I am trying to do. I earnestly try to be an example of the Savior I love him and love what he did for us. I love my Heavenly Father and I try to serve him with everything I have every day. But I fall short. This just gave me such hope that as I STRIVE to be this person I will accomplish it. Not now... but it will happen. I just need to strive step by step to be a little bit better. Still a little emotional. But it's been a good week. I have learned so much. I learn so much everyday.

Sora Newell and I. Gosh I adore her. Really I do. Sometimes we are so insych. We try really hard to prepare all of our Books and we have a message in each one. Everytime we have sat down and prepared one together it always ends up being on the same thing. Spirit speaks to both of us there! Gosh I can't wait for this week and all that we have to do :)

I love you all and I love your letters I really really DO!

HAPPY 2 YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO MATT AND CHANTAL! Do you have a name for my new niece? Yes, it's my new niece and not your new baby daughter... haha I'm claiming it :)

Dad and Mom... I'm so happy to hear about the Family History that you are doing. Seriously I can't even tell you how happy I am with that. Here in Romania we don't really have access to that. Or actually we are just getting access to their records. It's this HUGE project going on. I know that Family History is just another way of missionary work :) I'm so excited. You have to teach me all that you know when I come home!

No, I'm not in the same area as the Van Wagners. They were in Galați... I think I spelled that right. Which is like right by the Ukaine border. I'm sure they have gone to Constanta though. It is so pretty!
I also would love to see Erik and Amy maybe before I leave? Who knows I'll have to ask President.

I love you all! And I hope you all have a wonderful week!

Cu Drag,

Sora Stewart